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    Confused about remarriage after death of a spouse.

    Why do most religions allow a person to remarry after their spouse passess away?

    Doesn't anyone believe that families will be together in the next life?

    Are people like my mother wrong? My father passed away three years ago, and the only thing that keeps her going is thinking she will see him again.

    I can understand someone remarrying after divorce, but not after death. I would think it would be better to be lonely in this life, and happy forever in the next.

    I am sure that the relationship between husband and wife would be different, but I still believe that after death they would be together forever, and it seems to me, that it is not right to marry again after the death of a spouse.

    If in fact families do see each other in the after life, what happens when you have more than one. There was an elderly lady in the nieghborhood, that married and out lived five husbands. Does that mean when she dies, that she will spend the rest of eternity with all five of them?

    Brenda

    ------------------
    Hope for the best, prepare for the worst!!!

    #2
    Its best to say you should leave it up to HIM because each one of us have to pay for our actions.

    i.e.

    The husband is a saint and ends up in heaven after being judged but the wife on the other hand has been wicked therefore ends up in hell.

    As for the remarrying after death of a spouse, i'd say if a spouse gets lonely after ones death then i think its in their best interest they shour remarry, heck i'd want them to just so they move on in life and not mourn over the dead for the rest of their god given life.

    But if the tables turn and I'm in the position where the spouse passes away, most likely I'd just wait till the next life just because of the comfort and saves the hassle of going through something again like a broken record.

    ------------------
    Jitna Diya Sarkar Nay Mujko, Itni Meri Auqat Nahi, Yeh Saab Tumhara Karam Hai Aqa, Mujh Mein Aisi Koi Baat Nahin.


    It is difficult to say what is impossible, for the dream of yesterday is the hope of today and the reality of tomorrow.
    Rabul MashriqaiN wal MaghribaiN

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      #3
      Being in the same situation as yourself, I too am not to excited about the idea parents remarrying after the death of a spouse. But, in a way it is our own selfish desire not letting anyone take our father's place because we do not experience the same lonelines as our mother. Even though I rather not see my mother re-marry in the end, if it would bring happiness in my mother's life then I would cast aside my own feelings in a heart beat. As for being re-united with family I have heard that we will be able to see and meet with our lost loved ones but that is about it.......

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        #4
        Originally posted by bcsm57:
        Why do most religions allow a person to remarry after their spouse passess away?
        You have to realize that most religions allow not make it compulsory. Therefore, people have a choice whether they remarry or not.

        Also, most major religions came into existence thousand(s) of years ago when societal norms were different. Most women of those times needed a "husband" to take care of them financially and most men needed a "wife" for domestic household duties.

        Additionally, the family is the most basic social structure in society. It is incomplete without a "father/head of household" or a "mother/nurturer" for the kids, as well as the father. And the bereaved spouse needs the companionship that a remarriage provides.

        Are people like my mother wrong?
        IMHO, I don't believe so. A prime example that comes to my mind showing that there's nothing wrong with not remarrying is Hazrath Ay'esha (RA). She was very young at the time of our Prophet's (SAW)passing yet did not remarry.

        I'm not sure about the rest of your questions. All I know is that whatever will be decided on the Day of Judgement, it will be absolute Justice. Sometimes things are incomprehensible only because we do not have God's infinite wisdom & timeless knowledge.


        [This message has been edited by Muni (edited April 28, 2002).]

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          #5
          Originally posted by theboyz99:
          Being in the same situation as yourself, I too am not to excited about the idea parents remarrying after the death of a spouse. But, in a way it is our own selfish desire not letting anyone take our father's place because we do not experience the same lonelines as our mother. Even though I rather not see my mother re-marry in the end, if it would bring happiness in my mother's life then I would cast aside my own feelings in a heart beat. As for being re-united with family I have heard that we will be able to see and meet with our lost loved ones but that is about it.......
          That isn't even an issue, as my mother has no interest in getting married again. She is happy to keep busy with grandchildren and great grand children. My mother never worked outside of the home, but my father made sure that she would have money in the event of his death.

          She never dated any other men before my father. He was the only man in her life, and she is now 70 years old and has no desire for another. I have never known two people that were so close. My mother has always been a very religious person, and her faith and trust in God, keeps her strong.

          Brenda


          ------------------
          Hope for the best, prepare for the worst!!!

          [This message has been edited by bcsm57 (edited April 29, 2002).]

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