I got a call from a friend yesterday and while catching up on life in general, she confided in me her current dilemma. And to be honest I dont know what to advise her.
Here is the situation as it stands. She was in a long term relationship for around 5 years, quite serious about the guy. She is 22 now and her guy is around 29/30. They have been trying to get the families to agree to the match for the past two years and now it seems that it might finally go through. They just got engaged this past summer and she seemed very happy at the time.
The problem however has arisen ever since then. When they finally got the approval of the families, and this by the way is a perfect point for random posters to derail this thread, they took the next step and got physical. They had been absolutely certain that they wanted to end up with each other but were hesitant to go that far before since they were not sure they would be able to convince the families.
The first time didnt go as well as one would expect from such star crossed lovers, but then again, at the time I told her that it would improve with time. She maintained that they had amazing chemistry up until that point. They hadnt gone all the way before but certain things had indicated that it would be spectacular between them. These are all her claims of course. I do not claim to have any firsthand knowledge of this.
The guy is a reformed bad boy, and one would expect that he knew his stuff. For as much as I know, she was a a virgin but definitely had a wild side.
That said, it's been a couple of months since and she says that nothing has improved. In fact it has gotten more and more awkward and it seemed to her that there is a rift between them because of it. They no longer indulge in "romantic" conversations as they did previously on the phone. The fire has gone out of their relationship and reality has finally hit hard after five long turbulent years.
Bad timing, I know right?
So here is her dilemma. She is thinking, that since it hasnt shown any signs of improving over time, perhaps it is a bad idea to go through with the marriage. She feels, and I find her quite brave in admitting this, that she has a versatile sex drive and she shall grow to resent him over time for not being able to fullfil her. I really dont know what to say to her given that now both families are in high gear preparing for the wedding in January 2012. She doesnt know how to break it to him. If she should break it to him. And oh, there is another wrench in the gears
She may possibly be pregnant.
Advice please
Here is the situation as it stands. She was in a long term relationship for around 5 years, quite serious about the guy. She is 22 now and her guy is around 29/30. They have been trying to get the families to agree to the match for the past two years and now it seems that it might finally go through. They just got engaged this past summer and she seemed very happy at the time.
The problem however has arisen ever since then. When they finally got the approval of the families, and this by the way is a perfect point for random posters to derail this thread, they took the next step and got physical. They had been absolutely certain that they wanted to end up with each other but were hesitant to go that far before since they were not sure they would be able to convince the families.
The first time didnt go as well as one would expect from such star crossed lovers, but then again, at the time I told her that it would improve with time. She maintained that they had amazing chemistry up until that point. They hadnt gone all the way before but certain things had indicated that it would be spectacular between them. These are all her claims of course. I do not claim to have any firsthand knowledge of this.
The guy is a reformed bad boy, and one would expect that he knew his stuff. For as much as I know, she was a a virgin but definitely had a wild side.
That said, it's been a couple of months since and she says that nothing has improved. In fact it has gotten more and more awkward and it seemed to her that there is a rift between them because of it. They no longer indulge in "romantic" conversations as they did previously on the phone. The fire has gone out of their relationship and reality has finally hit hard after five long turbulent years.
Bad timing, I know right?
So here is her dilemma. She is thinking, that since it hasnt shown any signs of improving over time, perhaps it is a bad idea to go through with the marriage. She feels, and I find her quite brave in admitting this, that she has a versatile sex drive and she shall grow to resent him over time for not being able to fullfil her. I really dont know what to say to her given that now both families are in high gear preparing for the wedding in January 2012. She doesnt know how to break it to him. If she should break it to him. And oh, there is another wrench in the gears
She may possibly be pregnant.
Advice please
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