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    Can it last?

    .
    Last edited by Skittlez; Nov 23, 2008, 08:01 PM.
    it's the heart afraid of dying, that never learns to dance; It's the dream afraid of waking, that never takes the chance; It's the one who won't be taken, who cannot seem to give; And the soul afraid of dying, that never learns to live.

    #2
    Re: Can it last?

    i think if your friend is mature and thinks that this is it and is not stupid enough to do the same mistake as she did with the previous guy then i think she should do it, cuz in the end she is the one who is going to spend the life with him, but b4 she takes any step do everything possible to make sure that this is it. M y 2 cents.
    HUM BHI BEY SAHARA TUM BHI BEY SAHARA
    FITTAY MUNN HAMARA FITTAY MUNN TUMHARA

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      #3
      Re: Can it last?

      Firstly, I am going to say this girl is emotionally weak. A lot of people go through heart breaks and it affects some more than others but dropping out of school and losing one's personality is going a bit far.

      All this happened to her because the first guy promised her the world and more. So is this Mexican dude. She's falling for it again. This time it's not only school and personality, her family is at stake - no guy - I don't care who - is worth that. She needs that reminder.
      Young soul's search has been paused.

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        #4
        Originally posted by Straight_up View Post
        Firstly, I am going to say this girl is emotionally weak. A lot of people go through heart breaks and it affects some more than others but dropping out of school and losing one's personality is going a bit far.

        All this happened to her because the first guy promised her the world and more. So is this Mexican dude. She's falling for it again. This time it's not only school and personality, her family is at stake - no guy - I don't care who - is worth that. She needs that reminder.
        kya baat hai, u infact are str8 up
        HUM BHI BEY SAHARA TUM BHI BEY SAHARA
        FITTAY MUNN HAMARA FITTAY MUNN TUMHARA

        Comment


          #5
          Re: Can it last?

          ^ *like a pind kuri* jee, shukriya. :halo:
          Young soul's search has been paused.

          Comment


            #6
            Re: Can it last?

            NO.
            Your friend has this empty place in her heart. This dude is like a place holder.
            Like a zero.
            ﺃﷲ ﻧﯣﺮ ﺇﺴﻣﺇﯣﺇﺕ ﯣﺇﻠﺄﺮﺾ_ Best cheese-maker of monkVille

            Comment


              #7
              Re: Can it last?

              lol @ everlasting love.. gimme a break.. her "first love" lasted how long? what's so different about the "second love".... it's NOTHING but LUST. Love NEVER comes before marriage. You can give me million different reasons of love being true before marriage but reality says no. Tell her don't fall for this crap again. And he has a kid.. nothing wrong with marrying someone like that but come on, I am sure if he had brought his son with him at work everyday, there would never be this thing called "LOVE"..
              And never take those killed in the way of Allah as dead. Rather, they are alive, with their Lord, well-provided, happy with what Allah has given them of His grace [Al-Imran, v169]

              Comment


                #8
                Re: Can it last?

                .
                Last edited by Skittlez; Nov 23, 2008, 08:01 PM.
                it's the heart afraid of dying, that never learns to dance; It's the dream afraid of waking, that never takes the chance; It's the one who won't be taken, who cannot seem to give; And the soul afraid of dying, that never learns to live.

                Comment


                  #9
                  tell her to have a break from him to get her head round this. firstly like you said rebound is a huge issue. In her break she should look at her life what future goals she wants or where she is headed.

                  If she can see the man being a part of her life, then she should first help him convert to Islam. Also his immigration status will have a major effect you have to show her it is not going to be easy. if she is having doubts at this early stage then they probably are there for a good reason. Also what would her family say???

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                    #10
                    Re: Can it last?

                    hmm tell me this, do you in America get status or "quicker" status if you get married to a citizen?
                    And never take those killed in the way of Allah as dead. Rather, they are alive, with their Lord, well-provided, happy with what Allah has given them of His grace [Al-Imran, v169]

                    Comment


                      #11
                      Re: Can it last?

                      Okay, Ive got one line for all of this love-stuff:

                      Kya mein uske pyaar ke kabab banake apne bachon ko khilaungi???

                      As for the rest of it:

                      Your friend may very well be in love and it may also be the real thing. But lets face a few facts abt this first.

                      He is illegal

                      He is uneducated

                      He has a child from a previous relationship

                      He is non-Muslim

                      Even if we converted him ASAP and sponsored him, what good is he to her in all practicality? In the US or anywhere in this world for that matter, you have to be educated and capable of earning a decent income to take care of your responsibilities. Is he going back to school? Does he at least have a GED? What are his plans for the future? Meaning, does he have any ambition to do anything else in life? Aside from all of that, is he taking care of his child? Does he pay child support? Is he actively involved as a father in his kid's life? These things show strength of character and responsibility.

                      Your friend is probably a very nice girl and thats why she is in this jam right now. This entire scenario has trouble written all over it in big black permanent marker. If she doesnt realize what she is doing right now, she will be at square one again in a few years and this time, she might have a child with her.
                      Set your life on fire. Seek those who fan your flames. ~ Rumi

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Originally posted by cricketplaya View Post
                        hmm tell me this, do you in America get status or "quicker" status if you get married to a citizen?

                        Yes.
                        Set your life on fire. Seek those who fan your flames. ~ Rumi

                        Comment


                          #13
                          Originally posted by PSquared View Post
                          Okay, Ive got one line for all of this love-stuff:

                          Kya mein uske pyaar ke kabab banake apne bachon ko khilaungi???

                          As for the rest of it:

                          Your friend may very well be in love and it may also be the real thing. But lets face a few facts abt this first.

                          He is illegal

                          He is uneducated

                          He has a child from a previous relationship

                          He is non-Muslim

                          Even if we converted him ASAP and sponsored him, what good is he to her in all practicality? In the US or anywhere in this world for that matter, you have to be educated and capable of earning a decent income to take care of your responsibilities. Is he going back to school? Does he at least have a GED? What are his plans for the future? Meaning, does he have any ambition to do anything else in life? Aside from all of that, is he taking care of his child? Does he pay child support? Is he actively involved as a father in his kid's life? These things show strength of character and responsibility.

                          Your friend is probably a very nice girl and thats why she is in this jam right now. This entire scenario has trouble written all over it in big black permanent marker. If she doesnt realize what she is doing right now, she will be at square one again in a few years and this time, she might have a child with her.
                          i absolutely agree with all that you said.i believe she should be really careful and have these things in her mind before making any such decision of marrying him or so.
                          Success starts with beginning...

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Re: Can it last?

                            ^ Thank you.

                            One more thing came to mind:

                            While money cannot make a relationship, it definitely can break a relationship.

                            Meaning, if my husband has a plan in life and needs my help to get there, Im all for it. I will do whatever I can.

                            But if he doesnt know what he is doing then the chances of her being happy after 6 months of marriage are pretty slim.
                            Set your life on fire. Seek those who fan your flames. ~ Rumi

                            Comment


                              #15
                              Re: Can it last?

                              Sorry to say but what she is doing is haraam how does she expect anything good 2 come out of it? If she was hurt she should have turned towards Allah and he would have shown her peace but instead she went deeper into another wrong this time with a non muslim...

                              I also think that a mans status is very important he is supposed 2 b able 2 look after u be stable and after marrige when all this love gets replaced with responsibilities work jobs food rent children thats when u realize how important all this is to make a life long commitment. Advice her 2 not make an emotional decision and make more mistakes in her life shes young not married yet she still has a very good chance of marrying someone who is educated a muslim and not illegal or a father of a child. If she goes against her family and makes a mistake she wont even have them 2 come back 2 if it all goes wrong, the best way is 2 do things the way Allah has told us why is that so hard 4 ppl 2 understand..
                              Nothing is impossible to get when your asking from the one who created all and will end all

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