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  • decentGuy
    replied
    I forgot to share my own views on this. I think 99% of the time this is a very selfish and brutal reason for breaking up a long established relationship.

    Answers to the questions in OP:

    1 & 2- If reason is shared privately, no need to prove anything and just move on. But if reason is shared with family and friends, then one should give counter arguments like the guy in the clip did. Some will buy the counter arguments, some won’t. But not providing counter arguments would’ve been stupid.

    3- No

    4 & 5- No need for a counter argument there to prove anything but a simple denial is absolutely a must.

    A Pakistani colleague of mine shared with me once how her SIL hurt her family for more than a decade. My colleague's brother married when he was 18. They decided not to have kids till they complete their education. SIL later got into medicine and asked for more time. Nearly 7 years later, they still had no kids. Then SIL agreed and they tried to have kids but nothing happened. SIL diagnosed her husband with several problems which ruined the guy emotionally. And everyone believed her because the guy never argued otherwise due to shame, until it was found the SIL was secretly on birth control pills. Later on they had kids and SIL repented but did huge damage nevertheless. Moral of the story for me is not to stay quiet due to shame when wrongly accused of such things.

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  • Bobby1
    replied
    Originally posted by decentGuy View Post
    Bobby1
    I knew you would go into various tangents but not answer a direct yes/no question. Carry on.
    How is this a tangent? The guy cant satisfy the girl, she let him walk away with pride and dignity and he is getting all mad and vindictive and attacking her character. As a married person it should be very easy to tell he is lying. Any man with a bit of experience can tell if he has made the partner happy. His defence was oh but we did the act. If he thinks that alone will make a lady happy than he should not marry. If he was such a stud, she would not leave. Just the fact that she is ditching him is proof. Even if she needs to cheat, its on him as he was not able to be man enough to keep his woman. A real man does not have to force a woman into relationship, he would be pushing them away and they dont stop chasing them.

    Do you think the guy yelling and becoming abusive was good behavior?

    I tell my boys, they come and they go, be cool as a cucumber. She did him a favor.

    Leave a comment:


  • decentGuy
    replied
    Bobby1
    I knew you would go into various tangents but not answer a direct yes/no question. Carry on.

    Leave a comment:


  • Bobby1
    replied
    Originally posted by decentGuy View Post
    Bobby1
    It is ok if you think she is not lying. If the guy had used the exact same words and called off marriage in the exact same way. And the girl had used the exact same words that the guy spoke in reaction to hearing all that. Would you have then trusted the guy and called the girl the same things you called the guy?
    he was using verbal violence, attacking her character, yelling and using veiled threats. It is withers perogative to leave
    Diannes sister left Hans the rich dentist one week before wedding, he even took one year course to become catholic, they rehearsed tirelessly, all of Marielles family was supportive, he is still friends with family, he just left like a gentleman no yelling etc. She was way more mature, good for her to ditch the immature emotional egotistic man child

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  • decentGuy
    replied
    Bobby1
    It is ok if you think she is not lying. If the guy had used the exact same words and called off marriage in the exact same way. And the girl had used the exact same words that the guy spoke in reaction to hearing all that. Would you have then trusted the guy and called the girl the same things you called the guy?

    Leave a comment:


  • Bobby1
    replied
    You seem to be a misogynist, no one except the insecure guy thinks she is lying. That Indian man is a narcissist abusive insecure man child, everyone understands except for insecure men that sexual compatibility is a real thing.He could be amazingly compatible with someone else. In all my life there was so much compatibility and in some cases none at all. This is natural, why the ego trip.

    Girls do lie though,one Pak girl married an older guy, came here had affairs, blamed guy for impotence and left. Next time he learned his lesson didn’t marry a model looking girl, has three kids

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  • decentGuy
    commented on 's reply
    It's complicated.

  • decentGuy
    replied
    Originally posted by Pakistani Prince View Post
    In my humble opinion if your relationship gets to a stage where you have to prove your sexual power to a third person, you need to run and run fast away from that relationship. What happens between husband and wife in the darkness is amanat that should not be highlighted in front of others even if the girl wants to take divorce.
    Besides there is no way to prove such personal things.
    In the video the girl did not involve a third person the first time she announced her decision to call off their marriage. How about contesting such a claim at that stage? Should the guy have not bothered about it then as well?

    I think the guy was so much more invested in the relationship, hence his loss seemed greater when the marriage was called off. But, he is clearly done with it as well. He just does not want to be blamed for it.

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  • SID_NY
    replied
    Havent checked out the vid but is the girl basing her opinion on their mutual experience?

    Leave a comment:


  • Pakistani Prince
    replied
    In my humble opinion if your relationship gets to a stage where you have to prove your sexual power to a third person, you need to run and run fast away from that relationship. What happens between husband and wife in the darkness is amanat that should not be highlighted in front of others even if the girl wants to take divorce.
    Besides there is no way to prove such personal things.
    Last edited by Pakistani Prince; Jun 3, 2021, 09:10 AM.

    Leave a comment:


  • decentGuy
    started a topic Things We Don't Like To Discuss

    Things We Don't Like To Discuss

    I hope you guys watch the video below to understand the whole situation first. But in case you can’t, here is a 2-line summary of the video:

    Girl: I’m calling off marriage with him because he is unable to satisfy me.
    Guy: I have no such problem. Her accusation is a cover to conceal her true intentions.

    Things I would like your opinion on:

    1- Let’s assume the girl is lying, how can the guy prove it? Should he even bother?
    2- Let’s assume the guy is lying, how can the girl prove it? Should she even bother?
    3- If roles were reversed, would you answer #1 and/or #2 differently?
    4- Let’s assume the girl accuses him of being gay, how can the guy prove otherwise? Should he even bother?
    5- Let’s assume the guy accuses her of being lesbian, how can the girl prove otherwise? Should she even bother?

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