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When do you stop being friends with someone?

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  • Ateam
    replied
    Well, I believe the moment you realise they will not refrain from putting you at a disadvantageous position if their own interests are at stake. Its time for you to be stop being friends with them.

    Because these are the people who can safely be termed as enemy in waiting, serpants, negative people, etc. If someone is good person let a lone a friend, he will be Happy to help you out or to ensure your benefit at a social, monetary or any other oppertunity cost!

    Atleast i belive it, and I practice it, after all what is the reality of this world?

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  • mahool
    replied
    There are boundaries, when they crossed.. you be no more see those friends.

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  • ShimmerV
    replied
    This topic is so touchy for me on so many levels.

    Letting go of a bestfriend is worse than a breakup i feel because in a love relationship there may come a time when your heart becomes fond for someone else but with a best friend you’ll always have an empty spot. My belief is you dont find a bestfriend when half your lie is over cuz no matter what they have missed your first innings already and you cant fill them on those no matter what!

    Keeping all that in mind you give up on a friendship when you have no other choice left. When its come to friendship vs your sanity! When you feel that you are in a unhealthy unhappy relationship and you are hiding your true self to find acceptance in someone else’s eyes. In those ways i guess the signs are almost of what you would feel when a love relationship has started to become toxic!

    Its been almost 5 years i let my best friend go and no she didn’t betray me or my trust or was an evil person nor was she a bad person but she had her demons and i had mine and together we just rubbed each other the wrong way until one day things were said that can never be taken back.

    This may sound very privileged but its the worse thing to ever happen to me and every now and then i wana pick the phone and call her and just tell her how my day was or whats been going on and i know she’ll receive my call well but i think then what? same to the toxicity and let the thought and emotions pass. I have had incredible times with her which ill never forget and have changed as a person since this episode, i have developed anxiety & depression and don’t discuss my feelings with anyone anymore but it is what it is.

    I still dont know being misunderstood by her at every step was worse or being without her and not have her in my life in any capacity is worse.

    Sorry for the rant ‍♀️

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  • SID_NY
    replied
    .
    Last edited by SID_NY; Oct 28, 2020, 04:44 PM.

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  • Bobby1
    replied
    .
    Last edited by SID_NY; Oct 28, 2020, 11:11 AM.

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  • The Last Straw
    commented on 's reply
    .................
    Last edited by SID_NY; Oct 28, 2020, 11:11 AM.

  • Bobby1
    replied
    .
    Last edited by SID_NY; Oct 28, 2020, 11:10 AM.

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  • SID_NY
    replied
    I think when we realize they are actually not "friends". To me friendship is one of the most important relationships that requires sincerity, devotion, trust and what not. And if you come to understand that most of these attributes are not there, its actually ok to call it off.

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  • The Last Straw
    replied
    Originally posted by Bobby1 View Post
    But than unsuccesful people are the loudest in social gatherings trying to get validation. Something like the small dogs who are the loudest.
    You don't say!

    So how small are you exactly?

    Leave a comment:


  • Bobby1
    replied
    People are generally successful because they are smarter and made better decisions, normally the advice or guidence of people who have messed their life up is not valued. But than unsuccesful people are the loudest in social gatherings trying to get validation. Something like the small dogs who are the loudest.

    Leave a comment:


  • decentGuy
    replied
    I was quite close to this guy, his parents, his brother and his family, used to plan picnics and outings for both our families together. We had some differences of opinions but nothing big. All in all he was and still is a nice guy. But I stopped being friends with him. The reason is a bit complicated. For him, those in significantly higher socio-economic status must be pleased at all times. When I would get into arguments with some guys in our circle with significantly higher socio-economic status, he would never speak in my favor despite being an eyewitness to their wrong doing. He was so scared of missing out on the opportunity to hangout with the rich guys, that he would first make sure he has secured their next invitation before reaching out to me and then act as if nothing happened. Took me a while, but I gave up on him after realizing that.

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  • Bobby1
    replied
    First there has to be a rail to derail, most threads don’t even get a single response lol. Yes a friendship can offer an opportunity to grow and associating with losers can destroy lives. I made sure my children associate with people who can be friends and mentors

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  • Eastern Dresses
    commented on 's reply
    This thread has nothing to do with mentorship so I'll really appreciate if you don't derail from the topic..

  • Bobby1
    commented on 's reply
    We in west have moved on from being a tribal culture and mostly consider people as people we know and not as friends. In many eastern cultures, we need those strong bonds for survival and for moving ahead. I stopped making friends and my life is much happier for that.

  • Bobby1
    replied
    Originally posted by Le Pakistan View Post

    You literally described yourself. lacking self-reflection there eh?
    People who I mentored are on top of the world. 3 of the four top performers in the city are my previous assistants.

    Leave a comment:

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