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When do you stop being friends with someone?

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    When do you stop being friends with someone?

    Have you intentionally taken a decision to stop being friends with someone? Why? Share stories!
    The Way of those on whom You have bestowed Your Grace, not of those who earned Your Anger, nor of those who went astray. (Al-Fatihah)

    #2
    I can't say I've done it intentionally but the only hypothetical situations I can see it happening in is in case of betrayal or something like that.
    Tell your assassin to aim for her head...because she doesn't have a heart.

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      #3
      When you find out that they are negative, judgemental, and toxic and have nothing nice to offer and are like cancer cells who destroy anyone they touch. They blame their circumstances on others and have excuses for failures and feel entitled because of religion, race ethnicity rather than their efforts. Just straight up garbage people.

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      • Eastern Dresses
        Eastern Dresses commented
        Editing a comment
        Do you see yourself being friends with them at any point? How would you make the discovery that they are as awful as you described them to be?

      • Bobby1
        Bobby1 commented
        Editing a comment
        We in west have moved on from being a tribal culture and mostly consider people as people we know and not as friends. In many eastern cultures, we need those strong bonds for survival and for moving ahead. I stopped making friends and my life is much happier for that.

      #4
      Originally posted by Bobby1 View Post
      When you find out that they are negative, judgemental, and toxic and have nothing nice to offer and are like cancer cells who destroy anyone they touch. They blame their circumstances on others and have excuses for failures and feel entitled because of religion, race ethnicity rather than their efforts. Just straight up garbage people.
      You literally described yourself. lacking self-reflection there eh?

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        #5
        Originally posted by Eastern Dresses View Post
        Have you intentionally taken a decision to stop being friends with someone? Why? Share stories!
        Yes, because they turned out to be disloyal.

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          #6
          Originally posted by Le Pakistan View Post

          You literally described yourself. lacking self-reflection there eh?
          People who I mentored are on top of the world. 3 of the four top performers in the city are my previous assistants.

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          • Eastern Dresses
            Eastern Dresses commented
            Editing a comment
            This thread has nothing to do with mentorship so I'll really appreciate if you don't derail from the topic..

          #7
          First there has to be a rail to derail, most threads don’t even get a single response lol. Yes a friendship can offer an opportunity to grow and associating with losers can destroy lives. I made sure my children associate with people who can be friends and mentors

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            #8
            I was quite close to this guy, his parents, his brother and his family, used to plan picnics and outings for both our families together. We had some differences of opinions but nothing big. All in all he was and still is a nice guy. But I stopped being friends with him. The reason is a bit complicated. For him, those in significantly higher socio-economic status must be pleased at all times. When I would get into arguments with some guys in our circle with significantly higher socio-economic status, he would never speak in my favor despite being an eyewitness to their wrong doing. He was so scared of missing out on the opportunity to hangout with the rich guys, that he would first make sure he has secured their next invitation before reaching out to me and then act as if nothing happened. Took me a while, but I gave up on him after realizing that.

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              #9
              People are generally successful because they are smarter and made better decisions, normally the advice or guidence of people who have messed their life up is not valued. But than unsuccesful people are the loudest in social gatherings trying to get validation. Something like the small dogs who are the loudest.

              Comment


                #10
                Originally posted by Bobby1 View Post
                But than unsuccesful people are the loudest in social gatherings trying to get validation. Something like the small dogs who are the loudest.
                You don't say!

                So how small are you exactly?
                The one that broke the camel's back. Watch out! :snooty:

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                  #11
                  I think when we realize they are actually not "friends". To me friendship is one of the most important relationships that requires sincerity, devotion, trust and what not. And if you come to understand that most of these attributes are not there, its actually ok to call it off.
                  Attitude is more important than facts.
                  "Life is 10% what happens to us..and 90% of how we react to it"

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                    #12
                    .
                    Last edited by SID_NY; Oct 28, 2020, 11:10 AM.

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                    • The Last Straw
                      The Last Straw commented
                      Editing a comment
                      .................
                      Last edited by SID_NY; Oct 28, 2020, 11:11 AM.

                    #13
                    .
                    Last edited by SID_NY; Oct 28, 2020, 11:11 AM.

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                      #14
                      .
                      Last edited by SID_NY; Oct 28, 2020, 04:44 PM.
                      Attitude is more important than facts.
                      "Life is 10% what happens to us..and 90% of how we react to it"

                      Comment


                        #15
                        This topic is so touchy for me on so many levels.

                        Letting go of a bestfriend is worse than a breakup i feel because in a love relationship there may come a time when your heart becomes fond for someone else but with a best friend you’ll always have an empty spot. My belief is you dont find a bestfriend when half your lie is over cuz no matter what they have missed your first innings already and you cant fill them on those no matter what!

                        Keeping all that in mind you give up on a friendship when you have no other choice left. When its come to friendship vs your sanity! When you feel that you are in a unhealthy unhappy relationship and you are hiding your true self to find acceptance in someone else’s eyes. In those ways i guess the signs are almost of what you would feel when a love relationship has started to become toxic!

                        Its been almost 5 years i let my best friend go and no she didn’t betray me or my trust or was an evil person nor was she a bad person but she had her demons and i had mine and together we just rubbed each other the wrong way until one day things were said that can never be taken back.

                        This may sound very privileged but its the worse thing to ever happen to me and every now and then i wana pick the phone and call her and just tell her how my day was or whats been going on and i know she’ll receive my call well but i think then what? same to the toxicity and let the thought and emotions pass. I have had incredible times with her which ill never forget and have changed as a person since this episode, i have developed anxiety & depression and don’t discuss my feelings with anyone anymore but it is what it is.

                        I still dont know being misunderstood by her at every step was worse or being without her and not have her in my life in any capacity is worse.

                        Sorry for the rant ‍♀️

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