coping with disappointment

[ravage]

im talking about losing something you've worked for years. something that meant a lot of things to a lot of people in your life and especially yourself.

practically everything to yourself.

losing that through a fault of yours, a bit of bad luck, and a bit of your history.

losing it after getting it.

what do i do..

platitudes will do. just say something..if you will..please.

[PakistaniAbroad]

sh*t happens.. shrug it off and move on..

[abc1234]

ravage,

i've been there... :/ and i know how it feels...

all i can say bro is...such things happen to everyone...but mayoosi and naa-umeedi r shirk/kufr....

just try to learn from the mistake and know that the future is still yours...hard work and faith in God will never fail you...give life a new beginning...but u must not repeat those mistakes...

good luck :-)

[zulaykha]

... and that's why you're meant to remain extra cautious at all times.

Life lesson #1 nothing will ever remain the way you want it to. There are so many "lessons" to learn, and apparently our teacher (and by teacher I mean Life, not the Greater Power that makes it possible) is into S&M.

However, some people say (and I must remind you I'm basing this on highly unreliable sources and not on personal experience) that if you fight for something hard enough, you'll get it. I think the nauseatingly hopeful cliche that we've all been forced to hear from every single adult that's had any part in our "growth process" at least once in the course of our pitifully controlled (as though we were plants in a greenhouse with constant feeding hours and just the right amount of lovin' - zilch in the case of cacti, excessive in the case of rafflesias *both not so nice - similar to people really*) lives went something like "when there's a will there's a way" (to tell you the truth I think it sounds like something someone thought up when having to face the perplexities of diverticulitis (excuse me) or something else of the sort equally disgusting yet not so difficult to overcome. But whatever - you could try it. Might work, and if it does let us know.

[Mindless]

I know it happens many times and at this stage you badly need your best friend, or someone who can share your problems, who can give you a shoulder. Also you should communicate with Allah, yes, through Namaz and dua, as Namaz is a way of communication we all know that. Go for it buddy, there is a possibility of everything, maybe you get what you want or maybe better than that, who knows. It’s not the end of the world after all.

[Yankee]

its easy for anyone to say but just move on and dont let the history repeat itself..

[ravage]

thank you, everyone.

im not going to let this shake my belief in myself. i needed motivation. this let-down is it.

PA/yankee: zactly.

irem: my mistakes are in such distant a past, and yet they haunt me every step of the way. what im angry about is that people would define me by that mistake, and not any of what i've done since then.

zulaykha: I have absolutely no idea what you're saying in the second paragraph ..barely had three hours of sleep in two days. I understand that you're saying something uplifting though, and feel promptly uplifted

mindless: it isnt the end of the world, yes. And I too believe in a Kind Allah.

[sadzzz]

Originally posted by ravage:
irem: my mistakes are in such distant a past, and yet they haunt me every step of the way. what im angry about is that people would define me by that mistake, and not any of what i've done since then.

this so reminds me of me..

[zulaykha]

Oh that's okay, I'm starting to learn that most of the time I don't make much sense to anyone. I really would've preferred to have said something as profound and consolatory as irem, except - well - she beat me to it.

[Sharafat_Ka_Namouna]

what im angry about is that people would define me by that mistake, and not any of what i've done since then.

tell me about it, I just write a note on my arm saying 'I'm surrounded by idiots'..honestly, makes me feel good

[abc1234]

Originally posted by ravage:
irem: my mistakes are in such distant a past, and yet they haunt me every step of the way. what im angry about is that people would define me by that mistake, and not any of what i've done since then.

hmm...r u sure its people and not u urself who's giving so much importance to the mistakes ravage? sometimes its difficult to forgive ourselves even if everyone else has forgiven and forgotten...
try to put whatever is bothering u behind tho....

[chandigarh]

What happened dude? Heartbreak?

That sucks, whatever it was.

Turn to your (real life) friends, its helps.... and helps a lot.

Best o luck...

[Xara]

life gives you lemons then make lemonade

things happen, you;ll get over it everything takes time

[KAKA-ATOM-BUM]

sit on an old broken couch... put some sad rafi songs on,,, and start bawling.
oh and dont shave and eat properly for a few days. dont use tissues. Use a handkerchief, or while ur in bed, let the tears roll on the pillow. The feel of a wet pillow makes u even sadder and more grieving.

Remeber, if this all doesnt work, just always tell urself that this is the end of the world and nothing could be done to make it any better. The only way from here is to go down and get lost furthur in the darkness.

[ravage]

Originally posted by chandigarh:
What happened dude? Heartbreak?

That sucks, whatever it was.

Turn to your (real life) friends, its helps.... and helps a lot.

Best o luck...

no, much more platonic stuff.. related to my career/family. half over it because i found an arguably better alternative, and plan to show up those undermining me right now.

life gives you lemons then make lemonade

things happen, you;ll get over it everything takes time

thanks.

hmm...r u sure its people and not u urself who's giving so much importance to the mistakes ravage? sometimes its difficult to forgive ourselves even if everyone else has forgiven and forgotten...
try to put whatever is bothering u behind tho....

valiant effort, irem, but its pretttty much them . i forgave myself ages ago although i knock myself up a good deal whenever it comes up.

sit on an old broken couch... put some sad rafi songs on,,, and start bawling.
oh and dont shave and eat properly for a few days. dont use tissues. Use a handkerchief, or while ur in bed, let the tears roll on the pillow. The feel of a wet pillow makes u even sadder and more grieving.

Remeber, if this all doesnt work, just always tell urself that this is the end of the world and nothing could be done to make it any better. The only way from here is to go down and get lost furthur in the darkness.

i bet the suicide rate amongst your friends is higher than the national average !