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is it too much to ask for?

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    is it too much to ask for?

    ... a trip to europe.
    I was just talking to my fiance about honeymoon destinations last night and was asking him what he had in mind for us. he said he's never really thought about it so wasnt sure. after he insisted, i did tell him wat i had in mind. we both agreed on now wanting to go anywhere in pakistan coz we can do that anytime since we're gonna be living in Khi. after the wedding.

    i seriously would love to go to europe... spain and italy in particular actually. being an interior design major, i just wanna explore all the gorgeous, historic architecture that ive been studying/learning about for the past few years.

    lekin at the same time i feel kinda guilty coz i dont think id be comfortable with him spending that much on a trip to europe, all the way from pakistan. and i dont wanna be a brat and say kay no that is where i wanna go. but i really do wanna go there... im so not in the mood of singapore, bangkok, thailand and so on...
    but at the same time i know these places are easier to get to compared to anywhere in europe, all the way from pakistan... or not?

    would it be too much to ask for at this point in a relationship. i mean i have know him for a lil over a month. maybe wait till later this summer to discuss this further? i dunnnoooo...
    just looking for some input from y'all.

    Healthy relationships require the willingness to compromise from both parties, don't they? I think you're entitled as a future wife to be able to at least let him know what you want though in the end the deciding factor is really whether or not he's ready for it financially. You know yourself whether or not he's capable, and what your (and by your I mean the both of you) priorities are. If he's still at the start of his career or whatever, I think you really should just settle for something that isn't so expensive, you could always go to Europe later, can't you? Plus, when you do decide to go to Europe you really should have enough saved up to take advantage of the shopping in Milan and Paris and what not or you're going to regret going (if you're anything like me). I can understand your fascination for the architecture and history (I hear it's beautiful and I would really love to go as well before I marry) and I'm very interested in interior design (though I know nothing of it) - I think it's great that you're in that field.




        yea ur right about the saving enuf to be able to go shopping in Milan and the rest of the cities. i guess there is still plenty of time to plan the trip out.

        his business is well established now, lekin im sure he will be bearing a lot of the wedding expenses from his side of the family... so i dunno... its kinda uncomfortable to talk about finances and all with someone new.
        but i wanna go to spain


          Yes, it might be too much to ask for if he can’t afford it financially but if he can then there is no reason why you shouldn’t go to Spain.
          The best approach would be to ask him to name a few places…If he says Murree then be happy if you end up in Singapore. Don't push the poor has just been a month. :-D


            I think its okay to mention what you would like to do, since he asked. I'm sure neither you nor him said that you must go there.

            I agree with Fayz, if hes able to and he has the means, and he wants to as well, then I don't see a problem. Just be sure that you take more than you think you are going to spend on such a trip, or have access to more funds if necessary, and try to loosely plan out your trip ahead of time, even if you dont follow what you have written. This way you can discuss things with him and gain his input on things he would like/not like to do.
            "O man! What has seduced thee from thy Lord Most Beneficent?" - Quran 82:6

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              Re: is it too much to ask for?

              Originally posted by Reemzy:
              i seriously would love to go to europe... spain and italy in particular actually. being an interior design major, i just wanna explore all the gorgeous, historic architecture that ive been studying/learning about for the past few years.
              as beautiful as those places are..if you are going there to check the architecture out in enough detail needed from an academic interest perspective, I would suggest that you go there later. Simple interest is fine, but detailed analysis type thing may not work out.

              You should be checking out each others' architecture at the honeymoon more than the buildings.

              second point

              as far as architecture goes, you can find great architecture in Asia..south east as well as south asia if funds are tight.
              The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he did not exist. And like that... he is gone.


                hey Reemzy.... i agree with Fraudz... if u cant go to europe to check out the architecture... go to the south asian countries like Thailand and Indonesia... indonesia has some of the most beautiful buildings (temples, mosques etc.).. but yeah ask neways its better than living in regret


                  Re: Re: is it too much to ask for?

                  Fayz - lol... he wont say Murree coz we both already agreed kay if we're gonna go some where its gonna be outside of pakistan. from wat i know, i believe there are no financial problems. lekin khair we will see.

                  Fraudz - i dont wanna go look at the architecture from an academic perspective. yea ive been studying all the structures in my history classes and thats why i wanna experience them in person

                  as far as each others' architecture is concerned... i think being in a romantic place like italy or spain wouldn't be so bad.


                    Yeah, one of my best friends has family in Las Palmas and goes back every summer, visits Madrid and all that as well, and each time she returns here she's got lots of great pictures and stories. I'd love to go and just tour Europe, from Lisbon to Prague to Athens (and everything in between).

                    sadzzz mentioned architecture in the Southeast Asian countries. Singapore is really great - very touristey - you'll see a mix of all the Asian cultures. It's good for the food, the shopping, and that kind of recreational activity. ( has lots of information on the place) If you decide to go to Indonesia, Yogyakarta is okay - there are two big temples there - the Borobudur and Prambanan. Bali is okay, kinda depends what you're into. Haven't been to Thailand, but it sounds/looks okay.

                    Well hopefully as the date of the wedding nears, the both of you'll get chummier and eventually (I hope) you'll be comfortable enough with him to be able to talk about this some more and let him know what you'd like. See if the both of you can settle for a middle ground if your dream honeymoon isn't possible. Be prepared for the worst though, life has a way of kicking you pretty hard on the backside when you're too optimistic.