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    adverts in newspapers....

    i thought that some of these were most amusing

    The following were actually taken from classified ads in newspapers:


    FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER.
    8 YEARS OLD. HATEFUL LITTLE DOG.
    ----------------------------------


    FREE PUPPIES:
    1/2 COCKER SPANIEL -
    1/2 SNEAKY NEIGHBOR'S DOG
    ------------------------------


    FREE PUPPIES...PART GERMAN SHEPHERD - PART
    STUPID DOG
    ------------------------------


    GERMAN SHEPHERD 85 lbs.
    NEUTERED. SPEAKS GERMAN. FREE.
    -------------------------------------


    FOUND: DIRTY WHITE DOG.
    LOOKS LIKE A RAT...
    BEEN OUT AWHILE..
    BETTER BE REWARD.
    -----------------------------------


    AMANA WASHER $100.
    OWNED BY CLEAN BACHELOR WHO SELDOM WASHED.
    ------------------------------


    SNOW BLOWER FOR SALE...
    ONLY USED ON SNOWY DAYS.
    -------------------------------


    TICKLE ME ELMO, STILL IN BOX, COMES WITH ITS
    OWN 1988 MUSTANG, 5L, AUTO,
    EXCELLENT CONDITION $6800
    ------------------------------


    COWS, CALVES NEVER BRED...
    ALSO 1 GAY BULL FOR SALE.
    --------------------------------


    83 TOYOTA HUNCHBACK -- $2000
    ---------------------------------


    STAR WARS JOB OF THE HUT -- $15
    ---------------------------------


    SOFT & GENITAL BATH TISSUES OR FACIAL TISSUE
    89 cents
    -----------------------------------


    FREE 1 CAN OF PORK & BEANS
    WITH PURCHASE OF 3 BR 2 BATH HOME.
    ----------------------------------


    FOR SALE:
    LEE MAJORS (6 MILLION DOLLAR MAN) - $50
    -----------------------------------


    NORDIC TRACK $300
    HARDLY USED, CALL CHUBBIE
    -------------------------------------


    BILL'S SEPTIC CLEANING
    "WE HAUL AMERICAN MADE PRODUCTS"
    --------------------------------------


    SHAKESPEARE'S PIZZA - FREE CHOPSTICKS
    --------------------------------------


    HUMMELS - LARGEST SELECTION EVER
    "IF IT'S IN STOCK, WE HAVE IT!"
    ----------------------------------------


    HARRISBURG POSTAL EMPLOYEES GUN CLUB
    -----------------------------------------


    GEORGIA PEACHES
    CALIFORNIA GROWN -
    89 cents lb.
    ------------------------------------------


    FREE: FARM KITTENS. READY TO EAT.
    ------------------------------------------


    AMERICAN FLAG
    60 STARS - POLE INCLUDED $100
    -------------------------------------------


    TIRED OF WORKING FOR ONLY $9.75 PER HOUR?
    WE OFFER PROFIT SHARING AND FLEXIBLE HOURS.
    STARTING PAY: $7 - $9 PER HOUR.
    ---------------------------------------------


    EXERCISE EQUIPMENT:
    QUEEN SIZE MATTRESS & BOX SPRINGS -$175.
    ---------------------------------------------


    OUR SOFA SEATS THE WHOLE MOB
    AND IT'S MADE OF 100% ITALIAN LEATHER.
    -----------------------------------------------


    LAWYER SAYS CLIENT IS NOT THAT GUILTY.
    ---------------------------------------------


    ALZHEIMER'S CENTER PREPARES
    FOR AN AFFAIR TO REMEMBER
    --------------------------------------------


    GAS CLOUD CLEARS OUT TACO BELL.
    ----------------------------------


    KELLOGG'S POT TARTS - $1.99 box
    -----------------------------------------------


    FULLY COOKED BONELESS SMOKED MAN - $2.09 lb.
    ---------------------------------------


    OPEN HOUSE
    BODY SHAPERS TONING SALON
    FREE COFFEE & DONUTS
    --------------------------------------


    JOINING NUDIST COLONY!
    MUST SELL WASHER & DRYER $300.
    ----------------------------------------------


    NICE PARACHUTE:
    NEVER OPENED - USED ONCE
    SLIGHTLY STAINED
    ------------------------------------------


    GET A LITTLE JOHN:
    THE TRAVELING URINAL
    HOLDS 2 1/2 BOTTLES OF BEER.
    -------------------------------------------


    FULL SIZED MATTRESS.
    20 YR. WARRANTY.
    LIKE NEW. SLIGHT URINE SMELL.
    -----------------------------------


    1 MAN, 7 WOMAN HOT TUB -- $850/offer
    ----------------------------


    2 WIRE MESH BUTCHERING GLOVES:
    1 5-finger, 1 3-finger, PAIR: $15
    ------------------------------


    FOR SALE BY OWNER
    Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica. 45 volumes.
    Excellent condition. $1,000.00 or best offer.
    No longer needed.
    Got married last weekend. Wife knows everything.
    A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?

    #2
    "A woman has got to be able to say, and not feel guilty, 'Who am I, and what do I want out of life?' She mustn't feel selfish and neurotic if she wants goals of her own, outside of husband and children"

    Comment


      #3
      Re: adverts in newspapers....

      I think, these are too much expensive adverts i newspaper. You can submit free adverts of any thing in this site.
      Last edited by ehsan; Nov 19, 2014, 02:30 PM. Reason: no adverts

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