Economics of a Relationship

[Dard]

I cannot believe you guys let me get away with this! Particularly the bleeding hearts on this site. The basic point was that if someone has invested more than the other in a relationship they are more desperate.I was planning a big defense when no one took me up on the offer. So here is the commented passage again.


It is very much possible that one person may have more invested in a relationship and stands to lose more from a break-up.

Wether you like an asset or not is independent of how much you invest. If you are making a profit you will invest.(i.e. wether you start a relationship)

But the amount you invest depends on the availablitiy of other assets and the relative risks. So if a person has more invested that just means that either
(1) there are few less risky assets available (only losers are hitting on you) or
(2) that there is a dearth of assets.(i.e. you are desperate)

Remember the assets with low yield are usually low risk as well and vice versa the high yield assests also involve higher risk.

Dard

[Jack Handy]

RElationships are abt intangibles.... things that u cannot put a value to .... economics in a relationship is an oxymoron....

[Nova]

dard,
I tried but couldnt fully understand it..
The person who invests more , has the need/capacity to do that , he gains more and loses more..
I dont know if the factor of alternative options can be used here , because , any relationship can have the potential to be a very lucrative investment...( Its not what the other person IS.. its what you make him/her out to be for yourself , or better yet , how much you can appreciate them , that determines their worth)..A loser to me , can mean a world to some one else..

[Stud]

Kindly define for me what you mean by "investment"
If the investment is Money then there is no issue here.
But if the investemtn is time, emotional suport and attachment then that is indeed a heavy price to pay for any "asset".

Stud

[Dard]

This has been at terrible dissappointment, yes obviously it is the time and the emotional attachment that we are talking about here. If someone is more attached in a relationship then the other person, then he/she is more desperate, i.e. lack of other options

Agree/Disagree/Don't care?

Maybe I just didn't get my message across properly.

[Stud]

Dard,
I would like to disagree with you entirely. Your theory is not only inaccurate and presumptuous but also lacks the depth required to analyze human interactions.

In essence you have stated that the person who is more attached and works harder on the relationship is desperate and lacks options.

First of all when we enter a relationship the emotional attachment and support is not an "Investment". It is not work either. It is something a man or woman would like to do.
You have confused reward and investment.
Emotional attachment and caring for someone is a benefit not a waste of energy. People who give more like doing so. They are enjoying it. That is why we call it "Love" or "Like".
You must have played a sport. If you run faster to hit the ball you are not investing you are doing so out of passion and the need to win.
In a human relationship acts of love are not bartered for immediate return. It is a slow process of gaining trust and having patience.

Stud

[kashmirigirl]

Stud excellent points.

Nova exactly what you think of the person, is a major part of how you perceive the success of the relationship.

Dard
If you don’t NEED the relationship and aren’t a little desperate (in a good way)….why bother getting into a relationship at all?

You live independently you can do as you wish,
spending money as you wish,
cooking, doing, saying what you wish
you can have sex with anyone you wish
adopt a child if you wish for children
if you are not in a relationship.

Why does someone need a relationship if they can have the above?

So the only reason to get into a relationship is because you are willing to be susceptible to the other's actions and to be hurt.

The reason you are willing to do so is because of the possible positive dividends.
If you are not invested or only nominally so, you will maintain your distance and your concern, thereby decrease your reward. Most people do this because they fear the possibility to be affected in a negative way

However….by investing more you will increase the possibility of reward…not because the other gives more but because the relationship is more meaningful to you and more emotionally fulfilling.