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A Muslim Girl's Guide For Dealing With Guys

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    A Muslim Girl's Guide For Dealing With Guys

    A Muslim Girl's Guide For Dealing With Guys
    (From o*ne Sister To Another)

    Life is full of crazy obstacles, but the o*ne that will probably bug
    you the most and always be getting in the way is the opposite gender.
    Here, from o*ne sister to another, is a Muslim girl's guide for how to
    deal with guys.

    No Touching! Muslims are forbidden to touch any non-Mahram (Mahram is
    your dad, brothers, father-in-law, husbands, grandfathers, and the
    siblings of your parents) person of the opposite gender. That means
    no patting o*n the back, no hand shaking, no pushing, no shoving, no
    holding hands, and obviously no kissing and all that. If you're in a
    difficult situation where you think someone will try to shake your
    hand, the best thing to do is just smile and say, "My people don't
    shake hands" and then explain why. And why, is because we believe a
    woman's touch is a privilege and she doesn't just share it with
    anyone.

    No Flirting! Not even with Muslims, not even in an Islamic school,
    especially not in a masjid! Flirting means that you're saying or
    doing things o*n purpose that make the other person attracted to you.
    There's no set criterion for what flirting is, but any girl knows
    what is and how to do it.

    Muslim women are supposed to behave better than the average woman,
    who has to be beautiful for all the men around her all the time, who
    are trapped behind their looks and o*nly judge themselves to be worthy
    if half the men they know are in love with them. A wise dude o*nce
    said, "Don't start the mower unless you intend to cut the grass". If
    you don't want a guy's advances, then don't do anything to earn them.
    There's no point in throwing yourself all over guys and trying to
    seduce half the world. You really o*nly want to marry o*ne guy, and you
    want to spend the rest of your life with him, and chances are he
    isn't going to be some dork you fluttered your eyelashes at in high
    school.

    No Boyfriends! As a Muslim, you know that having a boyfriend is
    haraam because it counts as Zina - fornication. Fornication, in easy
    English, means `sexual sin'. Allah expressly forbids romantic or
    sexual relationships outside of marriage. When people go against that
    rule, then you get the typical western society where people play
    sexual merry-go-round with each other, giving each other STDs, using
    and abusing each other, and destroying the sacredness of marriage as
    an institution. You can't even be sort of engaged to a guy, and
    then "date" to get to know each other. In Islam, non-Mahram men and
    women aren't allowed to be alone together (that includes talking o*n
    the phone!), to touch (not even shake hands), or even gaze at each
    other. It doesn't matter if the guy you like is Muslim, a great guy
    and the Prince of England, you can't date him.

    No Boyfriends! The easiest way to ensure that you don't end up
    falling in love with some guy before you're ready to get married is
    to avoid making friends with boys. Of course in school you have to
    interact with boys all over the place, but that doesn't mean you
    should be best buds with them. Probably 90% of relationships begin
    from friendships. Chances are you're not ready for marriage, your
    parents aren't ready to let you get married, you're still in
    school/college and your crush is not the sort of fellow you want to
    spend the rest of your life with, so just avoid being friends with
    him in the first place. It really is the best formula for saving
    yourself from needless temptation.

    When you have to talk to boys in school as teammates, lab partners,
    group members, and peers, it's best to maintain a distance. That
    means that you don't confide in them, you don't let down your guard,
    you don't unnecessarily engage them in needless conversation, don't
    joke around, and never flirt. Yeah it may be a little hard, but this
    is your afterlife we're talking about. So many great sisters have put
    themselves in really sticky situations because they allowed a boy to
    get to know them, and either ended up liking the boy, or having the
    boy like them. o*nce that happens you either end up becoming a pair
    (which is HARAAM!), or having to end your friendship. Instead of
    letting it get to that point, and then having to kill a friendship
    that you probably worked hard o*n cultivating, you should just stop it
    before it begins. There are plenty of great girls all around who can
    be your friends and if you really think o*nly a guy will understand
    your problem, then talk to your REAL brother, or your father, or an
    uncle.

    No Talking o*n the Phone with Boys! In Islam its forbidden for non-
    related guys and girls to be alone together because there is the
    chance for physical zina, vocal zina, and zina of the eyes. That
    means, with no o*ne there to watch you guys except that boogery
    shaitaan, then you might be tempted to actually DO something, or say
    gross things, or just stare at each other all lustily. With that in
    mind, it's also a safe bet to assume that talking o*n the phone with
    non-Mahram guys is a no-no too. Why? Because unless you've both got
    it o*n speaker-phone and you're chaperoned by a responsible person,
    then you're still kind of "alone" with him. The people in your house
    can't hear what he's saying to you, and his family can't hear what
    you're saying to him. There's a chance for some bad stuff then, so
    just avoid it. Not to mention, having some dude saying things into
    your ear that no o*ne else can hear would be gross in real life, why
    is it okay for him to talk into your ear via the telephone? For the
    most part it's just too intimate.

    Be Disaffected! What does that mean? Disaffected means un-affect-
    able. That means that nothing a dude can say can hit your nerves,
    make you blush, or get a reaction out of you. It also means that you
    are uninterested in what they do as well. Imagine yourself being in
    an airplane looking down o*n the scenery below. You're a little
    interested in what's going o*n down there, and it may look really
    nice, but you know that to get to the scenery you have to jump off
    the plane. Like the scenery miles below you, the guy may look really
    nice, but you know that to get him you have to jump off the
    plane ...errr...commit spiritual suicide, and though the fall may be
    fun, you will eventually hit the ground 600 meters below and go -
    splat o*n Judgment Day. Maybe even sooner.


    Short of becoming an ice-princess, being disaffected involves putting
    up a mental wall between you and all of male-kind. They don't know
    your thoughts and you don't care for theirs. You can interact with
    guys at school/college within the bounds of Islam, but always
    maintain a formal distance. Don't ask a guy how his infected toe is
    doing. Don't give him a hug when he looks down. Don't offer to help
    him with his homework. Don't go out of your way to remind him that
    you exist, and that you're not half bad looking. Even if you don't
    feel like behaving, make yourself behave anyway, your afterlife is
    important enough to discipline yourself for.

    The safest philosophy when dealing with guys is remembering
    this "He's not what I want, so why should I do anything to make him
    interested in me? That'll just make for a painfully awkward situation
    and it's not worth the sin anyhow."

    Remember that you're always being watched! Would you act all giggly
    and stupid with boys if the Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be
    upon him) could see you? No, right? Because you'd feel like an
    ungrateful idiot for disregarding the religion that Prophet Muhammad
    (peace and blessings be upon him) took so much pain for just to
    deliver to you. Well, imagine how ungrateful it is to act like a
    supreme idiot when <U>Allah </U>can see you all the time, and it's
    really stupid to disregard the religion that Allah prescribed, the
    favors He's bestowed upon you. How dumb is it to take the eyes that
    Allah gave you and do things with them that He told you not to? (like
    goggle at boys?) How much stupider is it that He can see you doing
    this, and you know it!

    You have no secrets! Not because Big Brother (whoever that is) is
    watching you, but because every single thing you ever did will become
    public domain o*n the Day of Judgment, and you'll be brought to trial
    to defend what you did. Just don't do anything that you wouldn't want
    your parents, your siblings, your teachers, your friends, and the
    whole world to know about, ok?
    My heart never knew loneliness until you went away…

    I miss you

    #2
    Re: A Muslim Girl's Guide For Dealing With Guys

    Comment


      #3
      Re: A Muslim Girl's Guide For Dealing With Guys

      Originally posted by [ Sh3rY ]
      Wake up up before I come over....
      My heart never knew loneliness until you went away…

      I miss you

      Comment


        #4
        Re: A Muslim Girl's Guide For Dealing With Guys

        Yes I agree,,
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          #5
          Re: A Muslim Girl's Guide For Dealing With Guys

          finally someone agrees.. btw wut is the devil face for?
          My heart never knew loneliness until you went away…

          I miss you

          Comment


            #6
            Re: A Muslim Girl's Guide For Dealing With Guys

            I agree in a satanic way,, but Yes, I agree
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              #7
              Re: A Muslim Girl's Guide For Dealing With Guys

              shuru ki do char lines pari i got the whole idea very nice advice
              Happiness keeps u Sweet, Trials keep u Strong, Sorrow keeps u Human, Failure Keeps u Humble, Success keeps u Glowing, But only God Keeps u Going....

              Comment


                #8
                Re: A Muslim Girl's Guide For Dealing With Guys

                nice advice....i just wish society was more like that.
                Tere naam humne kiya hai jeevan apna saara sanam
                Pyaar bahut karte hai tumse,
                Ishq hai tu hamaara sanam...

                Comment


                  #9
                  Re: A Muslim Girl's Guide For Dealing With Guys

                  Originally posted by Pyaari83
                  nice advice....i just wish society was more like that.
                  by that you mean that girls were more that ?

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Re: A Muslim Girl's Guide For Dealing With Guys

                    maybe she wishes the guyz to be decent n not flirt 24/7...
                    My heart never knew loneliness until you went away…

                    I miss you

                    Comment


                      #11
                      Re: A Muslim Girl's Guide For Dealing With Guys

                      how do you know what she wishes ?
                      and this guide is for girls.

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Re: A Muslim Girl's Guide For Dealing With Guys

                        I said MAYBE
                        My heart never knew loneliness until you went away…

                        I miss you

                        Comment


                          #13
                          Re: A Muslim Girl's Guide For Dealing With Guys

                          MashAllah.

                          Thank you for posting that Arsr.

                          I hope girls and guys alike benefit from this. As many tend to look away from all this...Which is the truth.

                          JazakAllah.
                          "Lets not dwell into matters which have already been dealt with 1400 years ago. Go read for yourself, and understand it yourself." Sh. Hamza Yusuf

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Re: A Muslim Girl's Guide For Dealing With Guys

                            My wish is that society be more conservative and follow Islam....for guys and girls BOTH! This a good guide for both at least the guy will know what a girls niath is and can back away himself too.....its called self control which a lot of us have lost today.
                            Last edited by Pyaari124; May 23, 2005, 03:13 PM.
                            Tere naam humne kiya hai jeevan apna saara sanam
                            Pyaar bahut karte hai tumse,
                            Ishq hai tu hamaara sanam...

                            Comment


                              #15
                              Re: A Muslim Girl's Guide For Dealing With Guys

                              ^ which no one wants to have today :s
                              "Lets not dwell into matters which have already been dealt with 1400 years ago. Go read for yourself, and understand it yourself." Sh. Hamza Yusuf

                              Comment

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