Decent and Indecent

[Muzna]

In another time and thread nadia21 posted the following:

"thats really upto the upbringing of the indivudual.....though very openminded and with no limitations i have never approached that part of the attire.......just cause its not something i would feel comfortable with .......however i have seen girls doing such stuff ......when i was in high school there were thesse two paki girls who used to reach highschool in a decent attire but changed it to something totally indecent for the rest of the day and then changed back again on their way home....."

Now, putting aside the negative references in the message (e.g. the word 'paki' used to refer to the two girls), can we focus on the term decent attire to perhaps define what is indecent?

If the upbringing of a person determines what they would consider decent and indecent then who is right to judge what another person wears? If everything comes down to a personal choice of what one is 'comfortable' doing and not doing then why call anyone else's approach indecent?

Any reasoning individual can figure out that whatever they happen to find 'comfortable' will also translate to 'decent'. Does it then go that that which is 'uncomfortable' is also 'indecent'?

[nadia21]

ok ok carry on with ur decent indecent approach .....but in my eyes wearing
------katta patta labaas is indecent--------
maybe u have fun showing off ur flesh ....i consider it indecent due to the fact that i am a muslim .....not by name that is .....


[This message has been edited by Admin (edited June 19, 1999).]

[dilse]

nadia21..kiya hal hai ap ka...

Decent and Indecent can also be your language,which you utter in public..or in gupshup...


dil..dilseee

[Imranz]

This topic has more to do with society as a whole than an individual's choice. Granted the upbringing of a person dictates what he/she would consider "decent/indecent", but mostly our opinions and lifestyles emerge from the cultural dictation.

A small example of this would be the fact that it is considered highly inappropriate to "blow your nose" in front of others in Desi culture, yet here in Western world it is not.

[Muzna]

That's precisely the point Imranz.

But if society as a whole has a hand in defining such terms then what happens to a person's independent choice?

[NYAhmadiX]

Generally speaking, the western society (for a lack of better classification) revolves around the "individual". That is even reflected in the laws of the land. Whereas an individual must revolve around the society (as in our). That's the basic difference and the starting point for further dissimilarities. An attire the way it is put on can have different meaning in different settings. (same theory as Munza's, and ImranZ: Society defines what is ….) Basically everyone likes to reflect a nice image of him/herself. Some girls (sorry for singling out) do consider a more moderate dress (long skirts, etc.) to be "sexier' than more revealing cloths. So it is her own perception as well that determines what is decent vs. indecent. Another example is that swim suites that cover body most are now in and are considered 'sexy'. I personally like the new tank-top and bikini combo.

In some families, moms walk in front of their grownup kids in very little attire. It is by no mean to suggest a lack of 'decency' in certain cultures. Couples going skinny dipping on beaches with their kids is normal in many countries. Not considered indecent by any means.

[ManiaX]

Btw, nobody can judge what is 'decent' or
'indecent' for others. I may find something that my partner wears to be sexy or attractive yet someone else may find it to be 'indecent'. Neither my nor the other persons
opinions matter..because we're not the ones
wearing the dress! See my point..

chow ppl

[devuchka]

Here is my response to your "indecent vs. decent" post from the "Desi girls wearing shorts" thread. Thats the place where Muzna caught your drivel and reposted - perhaps b/c she noted how you and your cronies were avoiding the real issue that started.

So dear, here it goes again:
----------------- cut post -----------
Oh, Nadia, you're so naik !!

Its amazing how in one sentence, you call it a personal choice and talk about your open mind (pun intended).

And in the next sentence, tout your own naik-ness while condemning the awaargee of the other two .... decent vs. indecent, utter rubbish ?? Whats indecent and apalling is the holier-than-thou attitude.

Open mindedness ?? The irony here is thicker than most ppl's head.

Dear, nothing is more unattractive than hypocrisy and spite ... and yes, you know what I mean.

Dev "disgusted" Uchka.

------------------
Getting UNeducated is better than getting RAGged - Maulana Dev Photonvi.
--------------------------------------------


[This message has been edited by Admin (edited June 19, 1999).]

[jewels of insignificance]

Dear muzna,

The decency imposed by culture or the society, is short-lived and meaningless. Sometimes even harmful.


I have been religiously taught that a child's upbringing should be based on the consideration that the child is a human being on its own, and possesses the capability to decide. If parents rather try and convince the child's conscience, this will bring positive results in the child, making him accept the standards of decency of the parents only if they deserve to be accepted, thus the newer generations will grow up to have their own new standards, suitable for their minds which are more developed than those of their parents.


how true can this be?



[This message has been edited by jewels of insignificance (edited June 17, 1999).]

[Roman]

I think the topic of this discussion involves more than one factors to decide upon what is decent or not.

One of the most objective measures of decency is the law. For example, if law of a country restricts wearing a certain attire then wearing such clothes won't be decent even if an individual thinks contrarily because law applies to all at collective level. You may disagree with the law, but that's a seperate discussion, you will still have to abide by it.

Second measure would be the norm of the society you are living in. As a memeber of a society, you usually have a common understanding of what is considered decent or not. As norms of the society change over time, so does the 'societal definition of a decent dress' and majority of the people conform to it. As an individual, you can still choose to wear something out of the norms of society if you can stand the aversion from the people around you but usually, you do realize how it is looked upon.

Beyond these factors/measures, the definition of a decent/indecent attire becomes a lot more subjective and comparative point of reference may differ from individual to individual.

[NYAhmadiX]

Dear Roman,

You make an excellent point, (even thought it is the case, I think Law should keep hands off of defining “decency”). There are enough Dress Codes (cultural, business, etc.) that are defined outside of the Legal Framework. That is plenty.

You are right in pointing out decency and how ‘Law’ plays a role in defining it. It is the case in many countries that Dress Code has been mandated by authoritarian measures. Afghanistan, Iran, Saudi Arabia are example of such places. Although these dress codes have cultural roots, but that has been made into a legal requirement.

[jewels of insignificance]

Dear roman,
you are right about the law, but we must first be clear of what law is!

there are laws of a country, laws of a religion, laws imposed by parents, and the laws of society.

Whatever type of law we talk about, it must relate to the unhealthy activity of imposition, leaving behind no room for a person's independant choice. This results in rebellion.

Decent is what inspires conscience, otherwise, indecent.

[MahaRaja]

jewels said .. decent is what inspires conscience otherwise indecent.

Well u summed it up brotha

MR.

[Rubiya Nur]

'


[This message has been edited by Rubiya Nur (edited July 30, 2000).]

[kashmirigirl]

Rubiya...good one.