First Time ..i Wrote A Poem

[pakistani kurhi]

arz kiya hai..




woh tarazoo hi kya...jismay bazoo-o ka wazan na ho
woh dillagi hi kya.....jismay dil par hi na lagi ho
woh shahzadi hi kya ...jissay shehzaday ka gumh na ho
woh raat hi kya...jismay khawbo ki laher na ho
bus woh zindigi hi kya jismay...jismay Asiqhe hi na ho!
yeh woh akhir hai kya
dondo dondo..hai kya yeh cheez
pata chal jaye to
hummay bhi batadena nacheez



this was my first try..i hope u guys will appreciate it..

[GuL-e-Tasbeeh]

Welcome in Poetry Forum Pakistani Kuri :-)

aap different poets ko bhii parhaiN iss say aap kii apnii poetry meiN bhii nikhaar aaey gaa, so keep it up and never hesitate to share, insaan yunhii seekhtaa hay :-)

[Hawkeye]

Good effort ... Keep writing

[Swera]

Yes.. KEEP writing..

:-)

[pakistani kurhi]

Originally posted by GuL-e-Tasbeeh:
Welcome in Poetry Forum Pakistani Kuri :-)

aap different poets ko bhii parhaiN iss say aap kii apnii poetry meiN bhii nikhaar aaey gaa, so keep it up and never hesitate to share, insaan yunhii seekhtaa hay :-)

thanx sooo much..i know i read one poem and felt like writting..

[ullujii]

Wellcome to poetry forum

[BanJaraa]

Ye BanJaraa ........ Aap ko Poetry fourm main khudshAamdeed kheta hai...

koshihoon se hi insaan kabyabii ke Pahar sar karta hai ....... aap bi aapni koshish jaari rakhye Idher poetry fourm main aap ko bohat vriatyty mile gii Nzaam, Nasar, Ghazal ki aur haan Rubaai marsiya zara short supply main hain magar milaain gey.... jitna ho sake idehr aur dostoon ki posts zaroor parhna.....

_________________ik BanJaraa_________________________________

[chodhry]

Originally posted by GuL-e-Tasbeeh:
Welcome in Poetry Forum Pakistani Kuri :-)

aap different poets ko bhii parhaiN iss say aap kii apnii poetry meiN bhii nikhaar aaey gaa, so keep it up and never hesitate to share, insaan yunhii seekhtaa hay :-)

very well said GT, i agree with you, and pakistani kurri jee, the best part is tht you have created something. n its a nice effort. improvement ahista ahista aa jaye geee. just remember how a honey bee works. extracting the assence from diff flowers (reading diff great poets) and then digesting it (understanding their thoughts and ideologies, their way of expressions) and produce the unique honey having all the good benifits of all the extracts and much much more (and come up with some thing of your own in a more beautiful chain of words.)

i hope this helps.

anyways, welcome in GS poetry forum. and keep up the good work.

[BeWaQooF]

Aap K Join Karnay Se Pehlay Mein Apnay Aap Ko Tanha Mehsoos Kia Karta Tha Laikin Ab Mujhey Aisa Lagta Hai K GS Mein Aik Or B... Opps Sorry Yaara Just Kidding

Nice Keep Writing

Or Haan GuL-e-Tasbeeh Ne Buhat Achi Advice Di Hai So Best Of Luck

[amirbilal]

very nice effort

[Zakhmi Umar]

nice jee keep it up

mien tu itna bhi nahi likh sakta

waise kabhi koshish karoo.n ga

[Koyal]

welcome in poetry section..

[Dilsay]

Very nice and welcome to the Gs and also keep writing